By now you should have tried all my suggestions for new and interesting places to have sex with people you meet when adult dating online.  I re-visited a couple of them myself, and realized that for an added thrill, keep the passenger-side window open an inch as you’re going through the car wash.  When you’re having sex in the reclined passenger-side seat, particularly in missionary position, the hot water splashing into your thrusting asscrack adds even more zest.  Clean as a whistle!

Without further ado….Part TWO!

The Zoo

In the poetic words of Trent Reznor, “I want to fuck you like an animal.”  And what better place to get primal, than in the butterfly enclosure at your local zoo.  Guys, for extra points: when you ejaculate, pull out of your lady and see if you can hit a flying butterfly in mid air.  Anti-aircraft stylez.  Stay alert, in case they’re the rare Japanese Kamikaze Butterflies – those little devils will aim right for you as they’re going down.

This one has to be planned well.  Either find a section of the zoo that isn’t that popular (see: goats), or wait until the end of the day, when everyone is leaving the zoo.  Do it in front of the gorilla enclosure – show them some new tricks.  Just make sure none of them know sign language, otherwise they’ll taddle on you the next morning.

The Library

Past the microfilm machines, beyond the encyclopedias, around the corner from the microfiche, and down the row with Ukranian Ashtray Folkart books, you’ll find a private little nook that’s just right for a quickie.  Obviously you have to be quiet in a library anyway, so when you finish, muffle your orgasm noises by biting into one of the Ukranian Ashtray Folkart books.

Added bonus of library sex: you can start by checking out some books on sexual positions or techniques, and have something new to try while you’re there.  And, if life is anything like my daydreams, a sexy librarian will catch you and join in the fun.  GOOEY decimal system is more like it.

Cemetery

Is she goth?  Fuck her on her grandmother’s grave.  She’ll love it.  Plus, if life is anything like my daydreams, the sexy librarian will be visiting her grandmother’s grave, and will join in the fun.  Asses to asses, thrust to thrust.

Amen.  Have fun!