Meeting new women through online dating and making the transition to face-to-face contact can be tough. Tougher still if she’s a Jesus freak. Or a Buddha freak. Pick your deity; if she’s into it, you gotta look like you’re into it too.

Here are some tips for a few of the bigger faiths out there:

Catholic Women

These are both the most challenging, and easiest women to romance. The trick here is to go to church with them. It’s really an excellent date: free and rapport building. You get to dress up and look good for her. Free snack and wine. And you don’t really have to listen to the claptrap if you don’t want. Spend your time imagining what she looks like when you get her out of her Sunday best. Plus, play your cards right, and could eventually find yourself together in the confessional desecrating the whole damn shebang.

Islamic Women

Inherent challenges right off the bat. First of all, all you can see are her eyes. You’re assuming a lot with these ladies. Hopefully she ends up looking like a Bollywood hottie, but she might look like your Uncle Murray. Best thing to do with these gals is go walking on windy days with her; then at least the burka will be skin tight at times, and you can get a hint at the goodies. Plus, twice a day she has to get on all fours and pray to Allah. It’ll give you a sneak peak at your doggy-style future.

Buddhist Women

These are the best women in many ways. First, she probably will be into kung-fu movies. Second, tantric sex. If Sting does it, it’s probably fucking awesome.

Hindu Woman

Two words: kama sutra.

It’s a challenging thing: this adult dating. But we’ll figure it out together.

Stay tuned!